A Big, Shiny, Glitzy, Gaudy White Lie
A friend of mine bought a new house and they are OVER THE MOON excited about it. When I first was invited over to see it, my friend was so excited to share her love of her new home with me. I was shocked. The home seemed at complete and total odds with my friend’s personality. Everything was white marble and quartz with huge pillars and all this detail that made it look VERY GAUDY. It looked like a bad gaudy church. I had to lie to my friend and say I liked it but I felt bad lying! What does one do in this situation?
P., from Beverly Hills, CA
Pray? Sing a hymn? Go play the white grand piano? Be careful not to slip?
You do EXACTLY what you did! You focus on your friend’s excitement for her new home, not the home itself. It’s a bonus to also be able to share in the excitement about the style, but you don’t have to like the home, to love the friend. You’re not friends with her taste, you’re friends with her heart.
The truth is, the reason you were able to white-lie (I hope) so convincingly is because you love your friend, and what was coming through I’m sure, was your happiness for her happiness.
Anyway, to be shocked by someone’s taste is kind of fun- you’ve just discovered she has some qualities which you never detected before. Maybe she’s Liberace’s distant kin. She probably has a family history or cultural background that influenced her taste as a young girl, and now she gets the thrill of being able to realize some of her decorating fantasies, as well as create a place that means “home” to her. Treat it like a visit to Fantasy Island and get into the experience of being in such an exotically slick and glistening shrine. Now you know what a dressed-up Maltese feels like. Wonderfully primped and overdone.
I have some wonderful friends whose taste I do not identify with AT ALL. But I can understand where the taste might come from, and appreciate that they are trying to create a home that is welcoming both to themselves and to others- that's the desire to tap into when you’re in the marble Hall of Mirrors. And really, who knows why we like what we like? There's so much that goes into building a self-image we project on our world, it would probably be impossible to get to the real bottom of it. I'll leave you with a quote from Ivana Trump (the one who escaped): "In each of my homes, I have a leopard room. I don't know why, but I do."
Taste is a mystery.
If you need some clarity, some change, or a refresh either inside or out, you’re on the right website for that help. Aubrey Thorne is an astrologer, coach, and feng shui designer in Los Angeles. She works with clients all over, both in-person and online. Feel free to contact Aubrey to ask a question or to schedule a consultation.